I Should have Posted this Last Week

Darn it, I forgot today was Valentine's Day!  I meant to post this a week ago.

A message to women:

What is it that most husbands would absolutely love for Valentine's Day? Well, based on my conversations with men over the past 25 years, as well as, listening and observing how men talk and act about this particular "holiday" (when their wife's cannot hear them); there is something that you can give them that would bless most, if not, all men.

Here is what I would highly recommend: First, ask your husband if you might be allowed this year to tell him exactly what you want for Valentine's Day. Once you have his attention, simply tell him that what you would like for Valentine's Day is absolutely nothing. Tell him that your gift to him this year is to let him off the hook.

Okay, I admit this was not what you might have expected to hear. But, perhaps some of you women, reading this blog, might actually embrace this concept. I don't think you will be disappointed--unless flowers make you happier than your husband's smile.

How I wish more women would do this. Do they have any idea how most men feel about Valentine's Day? I often wonder why women put so much emphasis on these things. Do they actually determine the level of their husbands love by how big a bouquet they get? Forgive me women, but I don't get it and I hope I never do.

Give your husbands a break this year and rejoice in the happiness you might bring him by blessing him with the freedom he will feel when he realizes that you are perfectly content without receiving the obligatory "Valentine's Day" gift. Now, men, make more effort to express your love for your wives all year round so that you don't feel you have to somehow make up for what was lacking the rest of the year by purchasing that ridiculously over priced jar of flowers that will die in a week or two.

Post Script:
In the event that you happen to be a man who absolutely looks forward to this day and can't wait to go shopping for that perfect Valentine's Day gift for your wife, please forgive me for even suggesting such things.

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Speaking the Truth in Love - 2

If you think you have been ill treated, you will have an opportunity of showing that you are a disciple of Jesus, who "when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not." . . . The wisdom that is from above is not only pure, but peaceable and gentle; and the want of these qualifications, like the dead fly in the pot of ointment, will spoil the savor and efficacy of our labors.

If we act in a wrong spirit, we shall bring little glory to God, do little good to our fellow creatures, and procure neither honor nor comfort to ourselves. If you can be content with showing your wit, and gaining the laugh on your side, you have an easy task; but I hope you have a far nobler aim, and that, sensible of the solemn importance of gospel truths, and the compassion due to the souls of men, you would rather be a means of removing prejudices in a single instance, than obtain the empty applause of thousands. Go forth, therefore, in the name and strength of the Lord of hosts, speaking the truth in love; and may he give you a witness in many hearts that you are taught of God, and favored with the unction of his Holy Spirit.

John Newton, Works, Vol 1 (Banner of Truth, 1985), p. 269f. The complete letter is available online.

What Motivates Your Behavior?

John 14:15: "If you love me, you will keep my commandments."

Jesus is lovingly stating a fact, but he's also making a precious promise: love will motivate behavior. He completely knows us, even the inmost thoughts of our hearts. He knows of our desire to obey and our shame and sadness because of our failures. But he also knows this: as our love for him grows, our obedience will grow, too.

The key to a godly life is not more and more self-generated effort. Instead, Jesus is saying, "Love me and your obedience will flow naturally from that love." The secret to obedience isn't formulaic steps found in a self-help book. It is a relentless pursuit of love for him. How then do I cultivate the sincerity of love that motivates obedience? By focusing more intently on his love for me than on my love for him, more on his obedience than mine, more on his faithfulness than mine, more on his strengths than mine.

Excerpt from "Comfort from the Cross" by Elyse Fitzpatrick